There are a few catalysts that have led me to write this poem. (1) It's timely in the sense that yesterday was Thanksgiving. (2) My dear friend, Simone, holds a "Thankful Brunch" the Saturday after Thanksgiving, in which we all evaluate what we're thankful for. (3) Lastly, I have been reading Chaucer's "Canterbury Tales" with my seniors, so I have rhyming on my brain.
Enjoy.
Thankful 2010
As I’m thinking of the things I’m thankful for,
I realize that I am thankful for much more
Than I will be able to capture with these words.
I will do my best, though each line may not rhyme.
The things I write are from the heart; things I am thankful for at this time.
It is only right to begin with my family.
If I could have chosen a dad, mom, and brother,
I am positive that I would have chosen no other
Than what I have been blessed with,
And now with a sister-in-law that I am a perfect fit with.
My nephew and niece are the joy of my heart,
Looking at their smiles, and hearing “Auntie Mel” melt me apart.
Not only that my family is so loving, but selfless.
An example that I hope I one day, too, will bless others with.
Through their unconditional love and encouragement, I find strength.
I hope that they feel the same amount of love from me that I feel from them each and every moment, each and every day.
I am thankful for Laela, and the technology
That has allowed me to remain close, though half a country
Apart. No matter what has happened in our day,
We can update each other; laugh, cry, only a phone call away.
I am thankful for planes and other modes of travel
Which have brought me another close friend from a Cape, though not Canaveral.
Simone has been a great friend through tough times, and good.
She has never ceased to invite me over to eat her delicious food.
Beee. You complete meee.
I have so many other friends I am thankful for, though I fear,
I will not be able to come up with enough rhymes to mention each by name here.
I am thankful for my church, the family I have there;
The different ministries that God has bestowed upon my care.
I am thankful for the youth group, and the senior girls.
I am thankful for singing on the worship team, even when my voice unfurls.
I know that God has placed me there to do His will in my life.
I pray that one day I will hear from Him, “Well done, good and faithful one.”
I am thankful for the job that God has given me again,
For teaching Seniors, Juniors, and the Freshmen.
I love my staff, teachers and administrators,
But most of all I love that God has blessed me with the position of Cheer Co-Advisor.
I am thankful for my health, and for my doctors who have found
The different ailments that have, at times, held me down.
I am thankful that God has my life in His hands,
I am thankful that I don’t have to worry, though I am changing my healthcare plan.
I am thankful for the beautiful apartment God has blessed me with,
But, especially for the fireplace, I don’t know how I ever lived without it.
I am thankful for the armoire that I wanted and thought I lost
From Ikea in March of this year, but Laela found in June at a better cost.
I am thankful for my hummingbird feeder and the two birds that come near
And fight over the nectar, silly birds, I will always have plenty here.
I am thankful for my incredible mattress, I really couldn’t ask for better.
I am thankful for the little trinkets God has allowed me to collect through my travels.
Here are some random things I am thankful for, but still just as vital.
I am thankful for cupcakes, sewing machines, aprons, oven mitts, and my bookcase from Crate and Barrel.
Peppermint Mochas and Iced Soy Chai Tea Lattes from Starbucks are my favorites.
I am thankful for my camera to capture the perfect moments.
I am thankful for frames and pictures, and memories that are fleeting,
Yet can be caught on film and thus be remembered so sweetly.
Though I am thankful for the good, that is not all;
I am thankful for the times of pain and suffering, as they have fulfilled my call
That God has given me, and the person He has called me to be,
Who am I to wish that such things hadn’t happened, shaping who is the very me?
I am thankful for the gifts that God has given me, not just those of material worth.
I am thankful for the love He has given me, especially because it is a love I don’t deserve.
I am thankful for the hope that one-day
Though it may be far away
That I will get to be a wife
Looking at my husband, kids, and life
Knowing that God blessed me with
The most precious and rewarding gift I could have hoped for.
Though that day has yet to come, and it is not promised me,
I will still be thankful, even if it is not in His will for me.
Looking back over this I’m sure I forgot
Several things I should have included but that doesn’t mean I’m not
Thankful for all I have and all I’ve been given
In these eleven months of two thousand and ten.
Friday, November 26, 2010
Sunday, November 7, 2010
blessed
Well, I have been thinking a lot about how blessed I am. I'm not speaking financially, though I have been blessed with a job in this Recession, but with my family. And, even more specifically: my parents.
I am not a daughter who lets her parents know enough of how blessed I am to have them in my life; a fault on my part.
Lately, as I continue to teach the youth of our nation, I have been poked and pushed with the number of children who have not been as fortunate as me in this area of life. This was something that (1) was not as prevalent when I was in high school, or (2) something that I was blind to due to my fortunate circumstances. Daily, my heart hurts for my students, yet at the same time it swells because I am reminded of how lucky I am.
I was thinking about my brother's and my upbringing...my parents were always there supporting us no matter what time they had to wake up, no matter what financial cut they had to take so I could try out for Cheer or so our family could fly across the country for one of my brother's baseball tournaments. This support is not something that has ended; just last month when my bills exceeded my income, they were there in less than a heartbeat to buy me groceries, gas, and pay one last bill I wasn't able to - no questions asked; no hesitation.
I have always known, but it is revealing itself more as I get older, of how selfless my parents are and have always been. From buying me clothes last year when I started teaching high school so I didn't feel frumpy, to doting on their grandchildren, to taking in my g'ma to live with us, putting them on the couch and her in their bedroom for a year, to buying Granola bars for the kids in my 4th grade class who couldn't afford to buy snacks. This is a short list that doesn't come close to capturing the love that they have.
Something I hope that I will always carry with me in life is my parents selfless example. They truly have shown what it means to love others above themselves, and to sacrifice so another could have; an incredible example.
What a beautiful legacy they have left for me and others that know them.
Ma and Papa - if you're reading this, know that I love you more than you know :)
Sunday, August 22, 2010
happy 3rd anniversary to my dear friends
three years ago tomorrow i went to the montage hotel in laguna beach for the first time...a wedding! what a beautiful day it was. now, three years later, i was privileged to take their 3rd anniversary pictures. i wish you many more happy years of marriage, maggie and jeff!
Monday, December 14, 2009
"Quote" of the Day!
To preface this blog-worthy moment, I must tell you that it had just been one of those days. One might attribute it to the fact that it is a mere five days before a two-week break; one might just call it a Monday. Either way, this was truly the “Quote of the Day.”
As I was wrapping up the day with my 6th period, I had just enough energy to make it through with a still, slightly crooked, smile on my face. After returning to class from the library, I was wearing thin from numerous student’s subtle attitudes, pushing the line just enough to question “What?” when called out.
As I was setting the timer for our daily independent reading, one of my gems questioned me,
“Miss Murphy, why you in such a bad mood today?”
Upon hearing this question, naturally I answered with a question,
“Why do you think?”
This delight o’ mine responded in such a tone as for all the class to hear, as they were ready to begin the day’s independent reading with their new book choices,
“I don’t know, you on the rag, or something?”
Now, it took a moment to fully put together the content of the answer to my question. I do believe that the sudden gasps from the rest of the class, rather than the normal laughter from his comments, warned me as to what I was about to fully understand. As I emerged into this reality, my eyes widening in horror with every beat of my heart, I slowly turned around to face him, still interpreting his answer. Fully facing him, all I could mutter out was a slow, controlled, but slightly shaky,
“Oh…no…”
As I walked around my desk to call for a school proctor (campus supervisor) to kindly escort him from my class to the office of the Assistant Principal, the full brunt of realization hit. The blood from my chest beat into my head with full force, causing my normally slightly pink complexion to darken several shades to a shiny crimson. I was still processing when I dialed “zero” to get to the receptionist. Merely,
“I need a proctor.” was all that could escape from my trembling lips.
“What room?” the kind voice questioned.
“5…D-5”
“One is on the way.”
I could hardly let the words escape my mouth in a calm fashion.
“Get all of your things together.”
Within in moments that seemed like minutes, the nice new proctor opened my door with a smile on her face. I just pointed. He knew. He rose from his desk and left silently.
So, another day, another great quote. Yes, I have calmed down and can now laugh at this…one more piece to add to my bag of goodies of being a teacher :)
As I was wrapping up the day with my 6th period, I had just enough energy to make it through with a still, slightly crooked, smile on my face. After returning to class from the library, I was wearing thin from numerous student’s subtle attitudes, pushing the line just enough to question “What?” when called out.
As I was setting the timer for our daily independent reading, one of my gems questioned me,
“Miss Murphy, why you in such a bad mood today?”
Upon hearing this question, naturally I answered with a question,
“Why do you think?”
This delight o’ mine responded in such a tone as for all the class to hear, as they were ready to begin the day’s independent reading with their new book choices,
“I don’t know, you on the rag, or something?”
Now, it took a moment to fully put together the content of the answer to my question. I do believe that the sudden gasps from the rest of the class, rather than the normal laughter from his comments, warned me as to what I was about to fully understand. As I emerged into this reality, my eyes widening in horror with every beat of my heart, I slowly turned around to face him, still interpreting his answer. Fully facing him, all I could mutter out was a slow, controlled, but slightly shaky,
“Oh…no…”
As I walked around my desk to call for a school proctor (campus supervisor) to kindly escort him from my class to the office of the Assistant Principal, the full brunt of realization hit. The blood from my chest beat into my head with full force, causing my normally slightly pink complexion to darken several shades to a shiny crimson. I was still processing when I dialed “zero” to get to the receptionist. Merely,
“I need a proctor.” was all that could escape from my trembling lips.
“What room?” the kind voice questioned.
“5…D-5”
“One is on the way.”
I could hardly let the words escape my mouth in a calm fashion.
“Get all of your things together.”
Within in moments that seemed like minutes, the nice new proctor opened my door with a smile on her face. I just pointed. He knew. He rose from his desk and left silently.
So, another day, another great quote. Yes, I have calmed down and can now laugh at this…one more piece to add to my bag of goodies of being a teacher :)
Friday, October 16, 2009
Made my day...
After school today, as I was walking to the bathroom, I passed a few of my students clumped in a couple different groups of friends. One said, kind of sarcastically,
"Miss Murphy, you're my favorite teacher."
I replied with a smile,
"Yeah, I bet."
Then, two others, one next to her and another from the other circle of kids both said how I was their favorite teacher, too.
Now, whether or not they meant it, it did make my heart melt a bit. You just don't hear that kind of thing as often as you do when teaching elementary school...
"Miss Murphy, you're my favorite teacher."
I replied with a smile,
"Yeah, I bet."
Then, two others, one next to her and another from the other circle of kids both said how I was their favorite teacher, too.
Now, whether or not they meant it, it did make my heart melt a bit. You just don't hear that kind of thing as often as you do when teaching elementary school...
Tuesday, October 6, 2009
I love being a teacher...
I got an email this morning from a student from last year. She is in 5th grade now, and has sought my advice. I think it must have helped out. Here is what she wrote back this afternoon:
-----------------
thank you for that lovely email me and my bff have made up its just she was leaving me out at her horse show and it really hurt my feelings but she said sorry and i said it was fine so yeah these girls just think they are better then me but they are not. math is really hard so i told my teacher she is nothing like you but she said she would help me I'm glad to hear that you like teaching 9th grade! I have a jog a thon coming up and you have to have sponsors and in the spring i am doing track i am really excited. And the great thing is everyone forgot about being mean to me because we had a field trip. But i talked to my mom and i wanted somone elses opinion
THANKS
-----------------
AMAZING!...and I'm glad that she caught on with all the punctuation I taught her ;)
-----------------
thank you for that lovely email me and my bff have made up its just she was leaving me out at her horse show and it really hurt my feelings but she said sorry and i said it was fine so yeah these girls just think they are better then me but they are not. math is really hard so i told my teacher she is nothing like you but she said she would help me I'm glad to hear that you like teaching 9th grade! I have a jog a thon coming up and you have to have sponsors and in the spring i am doing track i am really excited. And the great thing is everyone forgot about being mean to me because we had a field trip. But i talked to my mom and i wanted somone elses opinion
THANKS
-----------------
AMAZING!...and I'm glad that she caught on with all the punctuation I taught her ;)
Sunday, July 26, 2009
surrender
as many other teachers in california, i was rif'd (reduction in force...essentially, i lost my job) on march 15th of this year. it came as no new news, as each year that i have taught i have lost my job. i remained calm, one of several who did, expecting the best. but, as june approached, with the budget crisis worsening, i was slowing losing my optimism.
i did finally go over the edge with stress. i didn't realize the effect i was creating until i had some severe medical issues. i had to have blood work done to make sure that everything was normal. i missed a day of school in the last week. sad. everything came back normal. praise God!
with the end of the school year, i faced packing up my classroom and leaving for an all-expense-paid two-week cruise the next day...an incredible gift! last year i left for africa the day after school ended, but i was able to keep my things in my classroom. (this wasn't helping my level of stress...my lack of trust in God)
i went on this incredible cruise, it was amazing. i saw places that i would have otherwise most likely never have seen in the mediterranean! how blessed i was! and yet, the looming darkness of the unknown...i was losing my home. where would i live? where would i work? could i even find a job? would i really need to move out of the state? the budget will come around, right? these questions were a constant echo in my thoughts daily. every once in a while, i was able to realize how much they were effecting me. could feel the burden weighing me down.
i had just over a week and a half after getting home from the cruise until i had to leave for another week for summer camp. i didn't want to go. i was waiting for paperwork for unemployment to come in, i was still waiting to find out if i was accepted into the graduate program at cal state fullerton (if i couldn't make money, why not spend it on more education ;)
i tried to get out of it, but i am so glad that i couldn't. (again, sorry simone for putting you and jono through that!) as i was frantically packing, trying not to forget anything and cleaning up my house a bit so i wouldn't come home to a mess (yes, i'm that guy), i remembered to check my mail. i got the paperwork to fill out for unemployment! such a great way to start off the week. thank you, Lord! the biggest thing that i was worrying over at that moment was taken care of. okay, off to enjoy a week of hanging out with awesome kids in the mountains and two of my best friends. it was looking up :)
we got to camp, and it was so much more than i expected. God did a mighty work in the kids lives, but also in mine. it was exactly what i needed...hearing the truths of the word of God, playing games, laughing so hard several times a day, and not worrying about everything that was in the back of my mind. being reminded of how good God is everyday. being reminded to rejoice in Him. even in the quiet of the night, as i was about to fall asleep, it was hard to remember the faint worries.
at one point, bret, the speaker, made a comment. he said something related to if he sees people worrying, not trusting in God, then he might question whether or not they are truly saved. yes, this got my attention. seeing as everything about me for the few months leading up to this moment was exactly that...not trusting in God. it hit pretty hard, and initially i wanted to reject it, fight it, pound my fist and say not so! but, as i sat there, quiet, the heavy realization hit me hard in the face. God, who has been faithful more than i can count, in circumstances bigger than i need to recall, everytime...not just here or there, everytime He has been faithful...it was my Creator that i wasn't trusting. why does it take so long to learn?
from that moment on, my outlook was different. i can't remember exactly when he said that, but i know it was later in the week. i decided that when i got home i was going to get a storage unit, look for jobs all around california, and if i couldn't find one, then look to oklahoma.
we came down the mountain. one of the guy's in the youth group was telling me of the neat things God revealed to him throughout the week. my heart was light; the first time i felt this way in so long. it was amazing. God is good.
after leaving the church, i headed straight for stor-it storage. i had a storage unit there previously, and by returning with the little blue card i would get the first month half off with a free lock! (can't beat that deal!) i went in. everything was smooth. i didn't only get the first month half off, i got the first TWO months half off! my day was looking up. i decided not to take the free lock, as i had my own. i went to my car after signing the papers and grabbed my lock and my phone. i had to walk to the unit, as they hadn't put my gate code in yet. i didn't mind. it was so cool compared to how hot it was in the mountains.
as i was walking, i checked my messages. ryan, a teacher i taught with at vista del mar had called. a short message. "melissa, it's ryan. call me." (wow. that was short.) i called her back and the first thing out of her mouth was, "you got your job back." i'm pretty sure i told her to shut up. i was not having any joking, i was finally okay with leaving. i wasn't ready for anyone to play games with me like this. she told me that i was being taken back as a middle school english teacher, that they had revised the "lists." (i had only seen them once...to know that out of 248 teachers who lost their jobs in the district, i was number 25 in the bottom 25...my chances were near impossible.)
she asked for my email and password to see if i had gotten an email, and i had. i couldn't quite believe it. i nearly burst through the door of the storage place, i think i was even yelling, and i said, "i think i got my job back!? i just signed up for a storage! i think i got my job back!?! i'll come back." and then i hurried out the door. (oh, what that poor woman behind the counter was thinking)
it didn't take long for the surreal realization to set in. to put it simply, i was hysterical for about 45 minutes. there was so much to do. i needed to see the email and the list for myself (still not totally trusting that ryan wasn't playing games with me). i had to get another apartment. i had to cancel the storage that i had, literally, just paid for. i had to find out where i was teaching. i had to learn HOW to teach middle schoolers! i don't know the first thing about teaching middle school, except that i didn't like it much when i was in it because i was the fat kid "/
friday was kind of a blur. so much happened. it hit me. it hit me hard. i had finally surrendered my job, where i live, my life as i knew it over to Him. and He gave it all back, and more.
on saturday, when i went to get a new apartment (mine has already been rented out), i was blessed with a slightly bigger place for nearly $300 less a month. and it's on the first floor! (fun fact: it was the first apartment jono and simone had at the aventine!) i went to storage to cancel it, but i have to go back on monday because that's when the owner is there. the woman that helped me the day before was there, and she said she didn't know how to handle this kind of situation because it had never happened before. praise you, Lord!
my mom came up and we were going to start packing. (i am moving into my new place on saturday, and leaving for a bootcamp training and then africa only days later) we had lunch, and on our way back i checked my mail. i got my first unemployment check! and a letter from capo district. the moment of truth. would i find out where i would be teaching?! would i find out there was a mistake and they were sorry to inform me that i was not, in fact, teaching in the fall? why wait...too tense. open the envelope. my heart took a slight drop. my new placement is at san juan hills high school. HIGH SCHOOL!
so many emotions went through me...fear, excitement, anxiety. wow. high school.
naturally, my mom and i left my apartment complex immediately and drove down to the school, about 20 minutes away. it is so beautiful! it is brand new, this will be it's third year in existence.
realization hit. i will be teaching high school english in the fall. i will be able to chaperone prom! (i think that is the coolest thing ever!) i will be teaching. God has given me the gift of being able to teach each and everyday again. how am i so blessed? though i don't trust Him, though i let myself get to where i did. though everything was going wrong, He turned it for good. (He turns all things for good for those who love Him and are called according to His purpose.)
wow. i am still quite a bit speechless...though, if you're reading this you can't tell by how LONG it is ;)
i can't wait to dive in and see what He has for me to do in this school. He definitely has some reason for putting me there. He has prepared me for working with high schoolers...7 years of high school ministry. though i am going to be done working with high schoolers in the church, He has made it as clear as day that i am to still work with them. God, may i be what and who you would have me to be as i teach this year.
looking back, i can see how God has had His hand in everything, every little detail. when i was in college, approaching the end of my three years at csu san marcos (degree/credential program), i went into my counselor's office. i asked her about getting a minor in literature and writing, as i was getting an emphasis in lit/writing, and had so many extra classes (by accident) in it. she told me i was pretty far away from getting a minor, but i was close to getting a subject matter authorization in literature and writing. this, she said, would basically prove to the state that i was qualified to teach through 9th grade english. so, i took a heavy load my last year of college to complete it...18 and 21 units in my last two semesters. wow. God knew what He was doing way back then.
what a couple of days i have had. my head is so full of everything right now, so much to do, it feels like it is going to explode. (really though, i'm getting a headache) i pray that i learn...things that i still worry, wonder, contemplate over...hopefully i will learn, yet again, to trust God. knowing that He is in control, and that He has a plan.
on a different note...i think i'm going to need to change the title of my blog, as i will no longer be teaching 4th grade...
i did finally go over the edge with stress. i didn't realize the effect i was creating until i had some severe medical issues. i had to have blood work done to make sure that everything was normal. i missed a day of school in the last week. sad. everything came back normal. praise God!
with the end of the school year, i faced packing up my classroom and leaving for an all-expense-paid two-week cruise the next day...an incredible gift! last year i left for africa the day after school ended, but i was able to keep my things in my classroom. (this wasn't helping my level of stress...my lack of trust in God)
i went on this incredible cruise, it was amazing. i saw places that i would have otherwise most likely never have seen in the mediterranean! how blessed i was! and yet, the looming darkness of the unknown...i was losing my home. where would i live? where would i work? could i even find a job? would i really need to move out of the state? the budget will come around, right? these questions were a constant echo in my thoughts daily. every once in a while, i was able to realize how much they were effecting me. could feel the burden weighing me down.
i had just over a week and a half after getting home from the cruise until i had to leave for another week for summer camp. i didn't want to go. i was waiting for paperwork for unemployment to come in, i was still waiting to find out if i was accepted into the graduate program at cal state fullerton (if i couldn't make money, why not spend it on more education ;)
i tried to get out of it, but i am so glad that i couldn't. (again, sorry simone for putting you and jono through that!) as i was frantically packing, trying not to forget anything and cleaning up my house a bit so i wouldn't come home to a mess (yes, i'm that guy), i remembered to check my mail. i got the paperwork to fill out for unemployment! such a great way to start off the week. thank you, Lord! the biggest thing that i was worrying over at that moment was taken care of. okay, off to enjoy a week of hanging out with awesome kids in the mountains and two of my best friends. it was looking up :)
we got to camp, and it was so much more than i expected. God did a mighty work in the kids lives, but also in mine. it was exactly what i needed...hearing the truths of the word of God, playing games, laughing so hard several times a day, and not worrying about everything that was in the back of my mind. being reminded of how good God is everyday. being reminded to rejoice in Him. even in the quiet of the night, as i was about to fall asleep, it was hard to remember the faint worries.
at one point, bret, the speaker, made a comment. he said something related to if he sees people worrying, not trusting in God, then he might question whether or not they are truly saved. yes, this got my attention. seeing as everything about me for the few months leading up to this moment was exactly that...not trusting in God. it hit pretty hard, and initially i wanted to reject it, fight it, pound my fist and say not so! but, as i sat there, quiet, the heavy realization hit me hard in the face. God, who has been faithful more than i can count, in circumstances bigger than i need to recall, everytime...not just here or there, everytime He has been faithful...it was my Creator that i wasn't trusting. why does it take so long to learn?
from that moment on, my outlook was different. i can't remember exactly when he said that, but i know it was later in the week. i decided that when i got home i was going to get a storage unit, look for jobs all around california, and if i couldn't find one, then look to oklahoma.
we came down the mountain. one of the guy's in the youth group was telling me of the neat things God revealed to him throughout the week. my heart was light; the first time i felt this way in so long. it was amazing. God is good.
after leaving the church, i headed straight for stor-it storage. i had a storage unit there previously, and by returning with the little blue card i would get the first month half off with a free lock! (can't beat that deal!) i went in. everything was smooth. i didn't only get the first month half off, i got the first TWO months half off! my day was looking up. i decided not to take the free lock, as i had my own. i went to my car after signing the papers and grabbed my lock and my phone. i had to walk to the unit, as they hadn't put my gate code in yet. i didn't mind. it was so cool compared to how hot it was in the mountains.
as i was walking, i checked my messages. ryan, a teacher i taught with at vista del mar had called. a short message. "melissa, it's ryan. call me." (wow. that was short.) i called her back and the first thing out of her mouth was, "you got your job back." i'm pretty sure i told her to shut up. i was not having any joking, i was finally okay with leaving. i wasn't ready for anyone to play games with me like this. she told me that i was being taken back as a middle school english teacher, that they had revised the "lists." (i had only seen them once...to know that out of 248 teachers who lost their jobs in the district, i was number 25 in the bottom 25...my chances were near impossible.)
she asked for my email and password to see if i had gotten an email, and i had. i couldn't quite believe it. i nearly burst through the door of the storage place, i think i was even yelling, and i said, "i think i got my job back!? i just signed up for a storage! i think i got my job back!?! i'll come back." and then i hurried out the door. (oh, what that poor woman behind the counter was thinking)
it didn't take long for the surreal realization to set in. to put it simply, i was hysterical for about 45 minutes. there was so much to do. i needed to see the email and the list for myself (still not totally trusting that ryan wasn't playing games with me). i had to get another apartment. i had to cancel the storage that i had, literally, just paid for. i had to find out where i was teaching. i had to learn HOW to teach middle schoolers! i don't know the first thing about teaching middle school, except that i didn't like it much when i was in it because i was the fat kid "/
friday was kind of a blur. so much happened. it hit me. it hit me hard. i had finally surrendered my job, where i live, my life as i knew it over to Him. and He gave it all back, and more.
on saturday, when i went to get a new apartment (mine has already been rented out), i was blessed with a slightly bigger place for nearly $300 less a month. and it's on the first floor! (fun fact: it was the first apartment jono and simone had at the aventine!) i went to storage to cancel it, but i have to go back on monday because that's when the owner is there. the woman that helped me the day before was there, and she said she didn't know how to handle this kind of situation because it had never happened before. praise you, Lord!
my mom came up and we were going to start packing. (i am moving into my new place on saturday, and leaving for a bootcamp training and then africa only days later) we had lunch, and on our way back i checked my mail. i got my first unemployment check! and a letter from capo district. the moment of truth. would i find out where i would be teaching?! would i find out there was a mistake and they were sorry to inform me that i was not, in fact, teaching in the fall? why wait...too tense. open the envelope. my heart took a slight drop. my new placement is at san juan hills high school. HIGH SCHOOL!
so many emotions went through me...fear, excitement, anxiety. wow. high school.
naturally, my mom and i left my apartment complex immediately and drove down to the school, about 20 minutes away. it is so beautiful! it is brand new, this will be it's third year in existence.
realization hit. i will be teaching high school english in the fall. i will be able to chaperone prom! (i think that is the coolest thing ever!) i will be teaching. God has given me the gift of being able to teach each and everyday again. how am i so blessed? though i don't trust Him, though i let myself get to where i did. though everything was going wrong, He turned it for good. (He turns all things for good for those who love Him and are called according to His purpose.)
wow. i am still quite a bit speechless...though, if you're reading this you can't tell by how LONG it is ;)
i can't wait to dive in and see what He has for me to do in this school. He definitely has some reason for putting me there. He has prepared me for working with high schoolers...7 years of high school ministry. though i am going to be done working with high schoolers in the church, He has made it as clear as day that i am to still work with them. God, may i be what and who you would have me to be as i teach this year.
looking back, i can see how God has had His hand in everything, every little detail. when i was in college, approaching the end of my three years at csu san marcos (degree/credential program), i went into my counselor's office. i asked her about getting a minor in literature and writing, as i was getting an emphasis in lit/writing, and had so many extra classes (by accident) in it. she told me i was pretty far away from getting a minor, but i was close to getting a subject matter authorization in literature and writing. this, she said, would basically prove to the state that i was qualified to teach through 9th grade english. so, i took a heavy load my last year of college to complete it...18 and 21 units in my last two semesters. wow. God knew what He was doing way back then.
what a couple of days i have had. my head is so full of everything right now, so much to do, it feels like it is going to explode. (really though, i'm getting a headache) i pray that i learn...things that i still worry, wonder, contemplate over...hopefully i will learn, yet again, to trust God. knowing that He is in control, and that He has a plan.
on a different note...i think i'm going to need to change the title of my blog, as i will no longer be teaching 4th grade...
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